A Very Musical Raw

– Crowd seems hot as hell tonight. Basing that strictly off of the amount of signs in the crowd.
– If they wanted Cena to be cheered, Cleveland is probably not the best place to visit.
– It’s 2004 John Cena!
– CENA SAID SHIT OMFG.
– Wow, just…wow. I never thought I’d say this, but John Cena has been untouchable. Why couldn’t they book him for the last 6 years?
– There is no chance I’m going to enjoy the Rock Concert as much as I enjoyed Cena’s rap.

Ziggler v Sheamus
– HUUUUUUUUUUUGE ovation for Cleveland’s own Dolph Ziggler. Damn they popped.
– Popped harder for Sheamus.
– Can someone tell me the last time Sheamus has lost a match?
– As of 9:15, 6 of the top 10 trending topics are WWE related. The only one that makes no sense is Billy Gunn.
– Ziggler threw Sheamus so hard into the announce table his entire back was red. Don’t often see that.
– I’ve been tweeted that the last time Sheamus lost a singles match on TV was SummerSlam. I don’t doubt this at all.
– Ziggler sells the Brogue Kick like he was shot in the face.
– Just an update, Sheamus is 14-1-4 for 2012.

Santino/Aksana v Otunga/Mark Henry
– Santino is announced as the first member and captain of Team Teddy at ‘Mania.
– Big Johnny’s Captain is David Otunga. That did is oiled and ripped.
– I haven’t seen Mark Henry wear blue since Brock Lesnar beat his ass in 2002.
– Safe to say Kofi/Truth to Team Teddy. Would much prefer them in a Tag Title match.

– Poor Zack Ryder, friends with benefits with Eve? That’ll never work.
– James Roday is pretty funny, apparently.

Jinder v Brodus Clay
– WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT JINDER’S HAT, IT’S BRODUS~!
– Jinder Mahal is not amused by the Funkasauras.
– “Brodus, you’re too green and your ringwork isn’t good enough. 30 second squashes are enough to tell me this.” NOTHING HAS CHANGED. And I don’t care.

– CONFIRMED: Shawn Michaels has plugs.
– HBK: “We always had the utmost respect for each other.” Um, I recall in your book, Shawn, you mention Taker warning you about the Montreal Screwjob and something about “kicking your ass, you scrawny little punk.” I think.
– WTF do they keep saying this is the end of an era?
– I like how all three men involved in this angle are taking a heel approach.
– Wonder if there’s tape on the hood to prevent it from coming off.

Punk v Miz
– I remember when the WWE Champion was the focal point of the show. See what happens when Cena isn’t champ?
– If Miz wins, he’s on Team Johnny.
– Best part about this match? The post match promo by Jericho. Calling Punk out for his dad being a drunk. Some deep stuff, man.
– JBL tried to get Punk to drink one time too; didn’t work out so well for him.
– More like CM Drunk amirite?

Swagger v Orton
– Poor Jack, his entrance was during the commercial.
– Pink shirt guy is back!!!
– Has Swagger ever been given a real chance? His ECW stuff was seemingly his best work, personality wise.
– HUUUUUUGE superplex.

– Only is wrestling is the white guy rapping and the black guy playing acoustic guitar.
– Can’t tell if crowd is just deep voiced men, or there is some booing involved.
– LOL ROCK UR SO FUNNY
– Die Rocky Die sign, what is this, 1997?
– The difference is Cena doesn’t need to read any sort of notes or cheat sheets, whereas Rock can’t NOT read directly off something.
– Once again Rock spent 20 minutes in the ring talking about bullshit. Cena in the ring for 2 minutes and cuts down the Rock and promotes the Mania match.
– HE’S READING THE WORDS OFF A 150 FOOT SCREEN AND STILL FUCKING UP HIS LINES.
– Perfect sign in the background to end the show: Less Trending More Wrestling.

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Posted on March 12, 2012, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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